Thursday, July 3, 2014

PixieChick #3. Red flags

I'm currently tucked into a cozy relationship and am off the dating sites.  But, back when i was working the sites hard, I found a lot of red flags.  Usually they seem humorous...

1. Soul mates. Web sites are great for perusing the potential.  Real Estate. Cars. New shoes.  Books.  None of them expect to be the eternal perfect fit without a real life once over.  Let's have coffee and decide if we'd like to move onto dinner before i start planning to do your laundry.  Because, I think that's really what he's searching for...

2.  Too many words.  When writing about yourself, most sites give you up to 5,000 character spaces.  As a writer I know you should aim for chapters around 4,500.  I'm not willing to invest an entire of chapter of reading before we meet.

3.  The Rant.  I had a guy who's profile kept popping up as "my potential match".  He was handsome enough, but pretty much all he wrote about was his disgust that *the world is wasting their lives sitting behind the TV*.  After a few beers with a girlfriend, I decided to write him and suggest that he try sitting IN FRONT of the TV.  Maybe he'd understand what all of the fuss was about.  Didn't hear back from him.  Huh.

4.  Wedding photos.  As in...them standing up in a wedding.  The other groomsmen are not so delicately cut out, and he has a big ol' beers in the parking lot smile on his face.  Yep, I like a guy who can dress up, but who really shows up for a date in a tux?

5.  Really Bad Grammar.  I taught 3rd grade for a bit.  If you couldn't survive as a student in my class, well...

6.  Crazy Physical Expectations.  They could right-out ask for a blond, blue-eyed athletic gal who'll play beach volleyball and run a marathon with him.  Wouldn't I shock him?  In fact, I struggled in talking to anyone who gives off a whiff of gym rat.  They typically give me a funny look when i suggest a quick stop for donuts.

It sounds like I'm all Goldilocks about my search.  Too talky.  Too needy.  Too dull. Too fussy.  I bring to he table my own batch of too much.  The sticky part is seeing if there is enough room in the relationship for all of our abundance.


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